Can Slowing Down Help Kids Go Farther?
The scientific genius, Albert Einstein is well known to have been slow in speech in his early childhood, and was also a quiet reclusive child. Is it bad to be slow? Leonardo da Vinci was an extremely slow painter; Charles Darwin took years working through his ideas. What makes people slow?
The need for speed is well-understood. Tasks need to get done, schedules need to be met, but what value does being slow provide?
Growth in Slowness
Sometimes, in the hurry to pack in a lot of learning, we push our children to try as many activities as they can. It is, however, worthwhile to take a step back, watch, and understand the child’s rhythm. We all have an inner cadence that helps us function optimally. Some of us are are giddy with energy, jumping in quickly with both feet; and some of us are deliberate, taking time to absorb.
The time that children spend quietly wheeling their cars one after another every day, playing tea parties with dolls, or pretending to be superheroes are all moments of heightened imagination and movement that harmonize to a beautiful situation. The key is to observe and ask: Is the mind engaged? Is there a germ of an idea being executed? Is imagination flooding over, as we hear our child speak to himself/herself while the play is unfolding?
That is growth. That is beautiful, transformative, active growth. To pull a child out of such an engagement or say, “Oh, what are you playing?” or “You made a mess!”, is sometimes the point where we diverge from their fluid reality. Rather than an impulsive reaction, a calm, effective means of clearing up with the child might be a better way to handle the situation. Through these games, they not only comprehend and reinforce perceptions of what they observe, but also add a dash of imagination. Children often experience heightened, accentuated moments - the crescendo that we ourselves wish to feel in the humdrum of daily life.
Try to build quiet slowness into the child's life. Allow the child time to play, make sure he or she is safe, but simply avoid getting in the way. Children need their space and time to quietly integrate, assimilate and put together key facets of learning and comprehension.
“My turn shall also come: I sense the spreading of a wing"
- Osip Mandelstam
What Can We Contribute as Parents?
Quite naturally, I get asked, what can we contribute as parents then? My answer: Structure, which is integral to growth. Just as their playtimes have a developing idea and a sequence of events, their external lives need sequencing, reasoning and order. Ever noticed how children go through a certain book for months on end? They suggest the same story for bedtime every night. Their love for predictability, the familiar, extends to their love for routine. Children enjoy routine and understand new concepts better in a concrete manner. Structure is innate to nature and life - from the order of the seasons to the Fibonacci number sequence. Ensuring a regular routine, guiding a child through a proper method of work (be it washing hands or handling a book), are ways in which we create the perfect scaffolding to their sense of inquiry. Along with freedom for exploration comes self-belief from ability, which can be nourished and eased by organization.
Roopa Srinivas
Roopa Srinivas has served as an educator for over 15 years. She currently teaches English. Her experience with children ranges from preschool to high school, which has given her a better understanding of growing up and self-identity. Her biggest learnings continue through interactions with children.
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